There is a certain baby-care related book, the title of which I am withholding, that two friends told me not to get. We got it anyway because we liked its predecessor so much. When Madeline was still resting comfortably under my rib cage and giving me heartburn, I began to read this book as I soaked in a warm bubble bath before bed. I posted here about the fear the book created, convincing me that I would be better off staying pregnant than giving birth to the sickly, screeching howler monkey that I was sure to spew forth.

I took the same course as Sheryl and Jakki, and told another friend not to get this book.

Now, since I didn’t have a howler monkey but did have a precious baby girl who loves to snuggle and giggle, I thought it would be safe to revisit this book in search of some wisdom I might have overlooked while wringing my hands in mortal dread the last time I read it.

I will say that the milestone charts have been quite helpful. Really.

I would also like to share with you some of the sage wisdom I discovered. (And, yes, I will be using an in-text citation so as to avoid plagiarism.)

According to the author, American parents are either, “totally sedentary, getting all their exercise by turning on the TV and reaching for a beer, or they embark on an overly rigorous jogging program that lands them injured in the sports specialist’s office within a week. And either they confine their babies to a stationary life in high chairs, strollers, and play yards or they rush out and enroll them in exercise classes the moment the can lift their heads in hopes of creating a fit-for-life infant athlete.” (Murkoff, 305)

Personally, I’m not much of a beer-drinker so I think I’ll go with the second choice. I mean, anyone who knows me knows that I am NOT an athlete in any way, but that doesn’t mean my kid can’t be, right?

The book also suggests that since the baby will end up being obese and ADHD if she sees a TV before age two, that we shouldn’t watch TV for our own entertainment during her waking hours, either.

What about you, dear reader? Are you the beer-drinker with the kid in the high chair or did you have your young ‘uns in Pilates classes before their first birthdays? Surely there’s no in-between, or the book would say so.

I have to go now. I have Madeline velcroed to the refrigerator and it’s almost time for her to go to gymnastics. 😉

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